en by slash and rose.

We're damaged people praying for something that doesn't come from somewhere deep inside us.
P.s. I will always and forever love "coma" wonderfully writt

lack of a father

lack of happiness. if there is one thing that is constantly renewed in my mind its the fact that i never and will never have an appropriately filled in father role in my life.. if that makes sense. half of you don't realize what hard working, loving,&great dads you have. as for me, i've been sitting around for at least the past 10 years wondering when i will get the chance to experience the warmth that a father can provide. it will probably never happen.

but it's okay.

on the other hand, i have a great mom and sisters, and a handful of friends im thankful for :)

just breathe.

i just need to step back and relax. i need to re-realize that i must keep on giving without expecting to receive, even if it hurts to do me so. it's just the right thing to do. i have to stop stressing and becoming upset by other people's unthoughtful actions.

the meaning of these two pieces of art (that i completed my sophomore year) is becoming reality again.

we sat next to the fire as the flame was burning out. i knew what you were thinking before you'd say it aloud
oh demi, how you keep me so fascinated with your music and better yet your lyrics. the whole cd is just perfect. obviously, my favorite song is every time you lie. i couldnt have been in a better situation to take my first listen to that song along with everything you're not.
anyways, i just got back from mexico/fresno/sf
its been three long weeks since ive settled down in moval.
mexico, well it was relaxing. no doubt i needed that vacation. before i left i just wanted to pull my hair out because of everything and everyone. i spent a lot of time with family, made me realize how dry of a life i live out here without any family close by :/ i cherish the saturday night when i had all my younger cousins singing a long to high school musical. it beat any party i've ever attended on a weekend. oh boy, i know i missed out on a lot [kalies surprise bday party at my house just to name ONE of the many things i missed out on] i fled to fresno last minute. why? because some news was just too fresh and i couldnt stand staying in moval. the news? well its a little sad, but certainly no surprise, i should be rather used to it by now.
sf was beautiful, reminded me of how im strongly considering transferring to a school out there.
this weekend i recieved NUMEROUS amounts of drunken texts and phone calls ranting about how everyone missed me, it was certainly nice to hear all that blabbbbin when i felt so alone :P
who knows it all right now? carson.
we got that bomb friendship :D
KBYE.